Current mood:	curioed
Current music:	Snape and Harry singing Kelly Clarkson`s songs

Part CCXXXIV - the dark-haired moron of Harry Potter
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Hermione was walking down the hall of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry . For some strange reason she was craving a good jump , possibly on a really bouncy trampoline .
As she was rounding a corner , just to her left there a big door appeared .
She stood there looking at it for awhile , then it finally clicked The Room of Requirement . ( a.n I don’t really remember if that’s what it’s called )
*
What the f*** is that damn door doing there . Thought Snape angrily . God this day just keeps getting worse .
He pushed through the door roughly and it closed behind him . But he was to surprised to notice . What he saw stunned him .
Know-it-all Hermione Granger jumping on a trampoline giggling like a school girl with her first crush . He had seen some of the first year girls act this way .
*
For some strange and disturbing reason he wanted to surprise her . He took off his outer flowing robes which he wore to scare the kids attending the school . Pulled off his boots and soundlessly got on the trampoline .

*
“ Professor Snape why are you on top of me ”
“ I think we’ve already established why I’m on top of you ” He said , again with that really annoying smirk .
“ I mean in this room here , now ” She replied starting to get frustrated with him .
“ I was walking down the hallway when I saw a giant door and I opened the door because I was curious is that so hard to understand ”
“ No It’s weird that you would decide to jump on me especially since you’re my profes…” Snape quickly captured her lips in a kiss silencing her . He stopped to look down at her and see how she would react to being kissed while all these thoughts were swirling through his head Hermione had her own thoughts .
Wow , what a mind blowing kiss and there wasn’t even any tongue I wonder hoe good he is at French kissing , she got a crazy thought . Hermione leaned up and kissed him . Severus looked down and she was kissing him she had her eyes closed and he slowly closed his . She slightly opened her mouth and he took this as his chance to slide his tongue in her mouth .
**
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Warnings: Prepare for OOCness (Which I find granted on SOME level because of the strange situations the characters will be placed in), MalexMale action, MalexFemale action, possible FemalexFemale action, smex, Male Pregnancy, Female Pregnancy, Foul language, past abuse, some gore, and a whole bunch of other things that will probably happen but I haven’t quite figured them out yet!
*
“MARRIGE & CONCEPTION LAW PASSED!
Just this afternoon, Minister for Magic, Cornelius Fudge and his advisors and the Wizingmont passed the ‘Marriage & Conception act’. It is a law the will force all Wizarding teens ages 15 and up to Marry before their 16th birthday, if their 16th birthday has already passed then they have ten days to marry after today.
The Law states that the Minister and the new office made up just for this law called the Magical Marriage & Contraception office will arrange a marriage for all 15-19 year olds to any wizard or witch that is either another 15-19 year old OR 20-55 and is divorced, widowed, unengaged or unmarried.
All 15-19 year olds will receive a notice magically at 10:15 tonight telling them their betrothed’s name, age, and to tell the teenager where to meet and what time to meet for the marriage ceremony. Of course teens are urged to meet with their betrothed before the preset date of marriage.
All 20-55 year olds will also be married to anyone that is either 15-29 or a 20-55 year old and meeting the same requirements as stated above.
All 20-55 year olds will receive a similar notice tonight at 10:20, telling the name, age, and time and place of the marriage ceremony. The adults are urged to meet with the teens before the date of marriage.
As another stipulation of the Law, the carrier partner MUST conceive a child for the newlywed couples by BEFORE the second year anniversary of the marriage.
NOTE THAT THIS IS NOT AN OPTION!
*
‘Dear Mr. Potter,
By order of the Marriage & Conception law, you are to marry Severus Tobias Dmitri Snape on the 29th of July. Please come to the office of Magical Marriage & Contraception to marry Mr. Snape on said date at 5:45 pm.
*
“How ‘bout you Hermione,” Charlie asked as he re-read his letter.
“Gregory Goyal,” Hermione stated in an annoyed voice.
“You Percy,” Charlie said.
“Rabastan Lestrange,” Percy murmured. A sharp intake of breath came from Sirius and a gulp from Molly and a snort of anger from Arthur.
“Remus?” Sirius asked.
“Fenrir Greyback,” Remus said in such a small voice that some had to crane their heads to hear him.
*
“I Harry Potter here by claim Severus Snape as my husband and bond mate. As the carrier of this pair I swear to care for him, protect his honor, bare and rear any children we may have. I swear to uphold his social standing to the best of my ability and make a good family life for him,” Harry said softly.
“I, by the power invested in me by the Ministry for Magic, hereby bond you for life as husbands and bond mates,” the official said. The blood that was trickling down their arms turned into a magical crimson ribbon, bound the two hands and then disappeared in a flash of light. In its wake it left two white gold marriage bands on Harry and Severus’s left ring fingers. Harry’s has a rose vine that is inscribed in his ring spelling ‘Severus’. Severus’s has a rose vine that is inscribed on his ring that spells ‘Harry’.
“Kiss to seal your bond,” the official instructed.
Severus bent down and gently pressed his lips to Harry’s for just a few seconds then pulled away. Harry’s cheeks colored lightly.
“I now pronounce you Severus and Harry Snape,” declared the official.
*
-x-Start-o-lemon –x- (If offended by Yoai then do NOT read until it says end of the lemon!)
*
Harry’s back was laced with whip marks, again a group of them were fresh enough to only be days old.
Harry had a nasty shiner on his right eye and the left side of his bottom lip was busted. Yellowing and purpling Hand shaped bruises covered his arms and blackening and yellowing fist shaped ones covered his chest.
There were healed burn marks on his hands, probably years old.
Severus was at least relieved to see no indication of rape or sexual abuse. Except the sperm leaking from Harry that Severus had forgotten to clean them off.
*
“Because you are being forced to have sex with me, because I am hideous and scared and disgusting and small and everything everyone hates, no one will ever love me. Because I am a freak,” Harry said without emotion
*
“Be careful, love,” Severus whispered gently into his mate’s ear. Vampire dominants, such as Severus, always must take care of their mates.
“I’m sorry Sev, the babies kicked really hard,” the teen mate replied. Severus placed his hand on his mate’s distended belly and rubbed gently.
“Come back to bed love, you need not go to work. The vampiric healer told you rest is what you and the twins need. Vampiric pregnancies are rough especially for male carriers,”
*
“Little Ryder Conall Snape,” Harry said looking to his son, the boy was truly a mixture of his parents, his left eye is jade green but her right is so dark it’s almost black, he didn’t have any blue in his eyes like normal babies. His thin black hair is in curls now. He is very pale had his facial structure matches Severus except that he has his Harry’s nose.
“And Rexana Jocosa Snape,” Severus said quietly gently rocking his sleeping daughter. She was an exact match to her fifteen minuet older brother Ryder, she has the same eyes, left is jade green, right is dark; almost black. No baby blue in her eyes. Thin black hair with slight curls t it. Very pale with the facial structure of Severus with Harry’s nose.~
“Our children,” Harry cooed, he looked up into Severus’s eyes and they shared a sweet smile and then a chaste kiss.
*
Remus whimpered as Fenrir’s hands traveled south of the equator.
*
After about ten minuets Fenrir came in Remus and Remus came on his abs.
*
What we’re you thinking Ron?! Using ‘Curio’?! IT IS ILLIEGAL!
**
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An hour later, Harry was fitted with contacts and carrying a bill to come and collect his new glasses in a few days. He then headed out to find clothing stores that fit his taste. He had decided that he definitely liked baggy, but Dudley's old clothes were really pushing it. They were more than baggy. He was swimming in them. He quickly found a Goth/punk store that said they were about the music and headed in. He decided quickly that he liked this place; it suited his thoughts, dark. The majority of the clothes were black or were colors close to that. He walked around picking up bondage pants and Dickies along with tee-shirts that had sayings on them. He also found a pair of boots that he bought. They came up to mid calf with flames on the toes and heels. After you laced the boots, he then had to buckle them, but to get them off afterwards he just unzipped them. He also bought some black fingerless gloves, some wrist cuffs, and a few other things that would go well with his new clothes.
*
Finally she was finished and Harry was turned towards a mirror so that he could see the final look. When he saw what she had done, he was extremely pleased. His hair now hung down to his hips and appeared to have crimson running down it. She had added blood red highlights into is hair, some starting from the roots, some further down, it had a rather startling effect.
*
Sit down than the Headmaster began a speech. He said “In November we will be participating in a new entertainment on
November 1-5. On the evening of these dates we will hold a special project. Each person of their own or a band can pick whatever they choose and present this project to the WHOLE
SCHOOL.” Everyone is so excited about this new project.
(...)
Harry and
HIS SLYTHERIN FRIENDS made up plans stating who could do what and sing what lines ECT… Harry had decided to sing a song from a muggle band in wherever she lives in. His song would be from Kelly Clarkson. The title for this song is Addicted.
Harry told his fellow slytherins what he is going to do and sing.
The slytherins agree to what Harry is singing and formed a band.
*
Professor Snape came walking by the classroom that Harry is using
& stopped to hear someone’s lovely voice singing in the classroom. Harry continuing to sing without realizing that the
Professor is there.
“It's like you're a leech
Sucking the life from me it's like I can't breathe
*
Harry asked professor Snape. You are very good at singing, tell me… why didn’t you say so when I wanted to talk to you Mr. Potter? Professor Snape asked Harry. Because it didn’t matter than, why should it matter to you now? Because Mr. Potter you have a beautiful voice that I can’t seem to get out of my head.
Professor Snape thought.
*
That is a wonderful song Mr. Potter. I am wondering if you could
Perhaps teach me how to sing muggle songs like the one you’re doing.? Harry’s professor asked.
**
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The only things she would miss in the U.S. were her best friends, muggle and magical alike. ‘Especially Curt, the gay one. And Indy, the incredibly, dim-witted one. Ahh… I’m gonna miss those two.’
*
Indy finally tried to help Curt lift the very heavy suitcase. “Damb, what the fuck did you put in here, your whole room?” Shayla sighed, she had to do everything. “Yes! And I can’t ever rely on you guy’s for anything can I? Seriously, for witches, you guy’s really are completely useless.” She flicked her wand at the suitcase, and with one simple charm it could be easily moved. “Well then shit, Shayla, why didn’t you just do that in the first place?” Indy practically shouted. “Cause I didn’t feel like it, shit!” Right about then, Shayla pulled out her IPod, and popped in her earphones to tune out the rest of Indy’s rant, by turning it up all the way.
“Whatever.” Shayla waved her off non-chalantly. “Yeah ok, whatever, Shayla. Cause you know what? You’re a bitch.” Indy retorted. “You took the words right out of my mouth.” Shayla smirked. ‘What can I say? I really am a bitch, in that I’m mean and selfish, cruel and nasty. Oh well, you are what you are.’ Shayla was not afraid to admit it to anyone
**(link)      (Pottersues report)
My wish came true. The first thing that happened was that Emily was standing out on the edge of the ledge. There was a sharp rock on the edge of the ledge. She stepped on the rock, howled in pain, and fell, almost a hundred feet out the window. Harry went down after her and fell almost a hundred feet after one of his best friends. I just stood there stunned, thinking that, two dead bodies laying on the side of the Astronomy Tower. But no…my prediction said that they would either be in St. Mungo’s, or at Tonks and Lupin’s. And if they were at Tonks and Lupin’s all three of us would be staying for Christmas and New Year’s. If they were both at St. Mungo’s, Tonks and Lupin would let us—all three of us—stay at their house for the holidays—Christmas and New Year’s—anyways.
*
As the healer came closer, I could see the pale, round face of Emily Fosen, and the dark-haired moron of Harry Potter.
*
“Let’s go, then, my stomach’s hurting…ow…really…ow…bad…ow!” yelled Tonks.
“Sweatheart!” gasped Lupin. “C’mon, let’s go back to our house. You’ll be pushing in no time at all, sweaty-pie.”
“Thanks, Remus, starlight.” said Tonks. “If I faint on the way there, it’s only because I’m nervous. The same theing happened to my mother when she had me.”
*
After going by portkey, again, Lupin helped Tonks to their bed, while the healer put paper between her legs.
*
I watched Tonks trying to push the baby out of her, but I got bored of that. So, I went downstairs to see Emily and Harry. When I looked at their lifeless-looking bodies, I thought they were dead—no—they couldn’t be...dead?
I slapped them on the face a few times. Finally, Emily woke up.
*
The healer wasn’t there. Apparently, the healer just left the Lupin and Tonks family, because the previous mother had an experience. So, the previous mother would help her daughter have the baby, and if there was a problem, then, the healer would come back.
*
The baby, whether it was a boy or a girl had a very fat head, and two chins.
*
It was a medamorphmargous, a witch or a wizard that could change their appearance at will, like Tonks for example.
*
The girl with the dark hair and heavily-lidded eyes was the one and only Bellatrix Lestrange, the witch who was a Death Eater, but quit because her husband, Rodulphus, made her.
*
Narcissa Malfoy was also lean and lanky, with blonde hair, and a smile of happiness to get out of the fire kind on her face.
**(link)      (Pottersues report)
"Who calls me?" Death said.
"Wh-who are you?" Lily asked.
"I'm Death. Now who called me?" Death replied.
"N-no one called you here Death," James stuttered
"Do you dare call me a liar!" Death shouted.
"I called you on acceident sir I'm sorry," A small voice said.
"Who speaks? Anwser quickly."
*
"How are you able to talk? Infants don't usually talk until they're older even in the wizarding world," James asked.
"Your daughter is very unique. She has the ability to talk because she heard you talking. Also she is very powerful. More powerful than the most powerful Wizard or witch alive or has ever lived. Her power will continue to grow." Death explained then Death asked, "May I hold her for a monent?"
"Umm... Well...I'm-" Lily started, but Faith interupted her.
"Mother it's ok."
Lily looked at her daughter and smiled then handed her over to Death.



Thanks to:
elethian for all the fics featured in this batch, except the ones that Pottersues reported, of course.